Yankees' Max Fried just helped fuel the paternity leave debate no one asked for

There is apparently a paternity leave debate happening in Major League Baseball this postseason.

Why?

Seriously. Why are we doing this?

San Diego Padres closer Mason Miller missed Game 3 of the NLDS against the Milwaukee Brewers on Tuesday because his wife, Jordan, went into labor with their first child. The Padres placed Miller on MLB's postseason paternity list, which permits a player to be away from his team for between one and three days.

The Padres were facing elimination. Miller is their All-Star closer. His absence unquestionably mattered from a baseball standpoint. It also shouldn't have required a second of explanation.

Then, on the other side of the country, Max Fried unintentionally gave baseball's worst possible discourse more oxygen.

With the New York Yankees facing elimination in Game 3 of the ALDS against the Tampa Bay Rays, Fried confirmed Tuesday that he plans to make his scheduled start even if his girlfriend goes into labor. She is due to give birth any day, but Fried said he has a supportive family and that the situation would not affect his availability Wednesday. And that's completely fine, too.

If Fried and his partner have discussed the situation and decided that he should pitch, nobody outside their family has any business telling them otherwise. But Fried's decision cannot become some ridiculous masculinity test for Miller — or for the next player who chooses differently.

Fried pitching through the possibility of his child's birth does not make him tougher, more committed or more serious about winning than Miller. Miller stepping away from an elimination game does not mean he cares less about his teammates.

These are deeply personal decisions involving two people, one of whom is quite literally giving birth. They are not clubhouse leadership exercises, and they certainly aren't opportunities for fans to determine which player "wants it more."

Every MLB fan debating paternity leave should remember Alex Vesia

The fact that baseball is having this conversation less than a year after what happened to Los Angeles Dodgers reliever Alex Vesia makes it particularly gross.

Vesia stepped away from Los Angeles before the 2025 World Series because of what the Dodgers initially described only as a "deeply personal family matter." His wife, Kayla, had been expecting their first child.

Later, the Vesias announced that their newborn daughter, Sterling Sol, died on Oct. 26. Vesia missed the World Series because his family needed him during an unimaginable tragedy.

Months later, Vesia explained that leaving his teammates was difficult but the decision itself was easy: his family needed him. That should have ended this conversation forever.

Nobody watching from the couch knows what is happening inside a delivery room. Nobody knows whether a pregnancy that appears routine will remain that way. Nobody knows what complications could arise for the mother or child. Nobody knows what that particular couple has experienced privately before reaching that moment. And frankly, nobody needs to know.

That is exactly why Miller shouldn't have to justify leaving the Padres during an elimination game. It is why Fried shouldn't have to justify pitching for the Yankees, either. The only people whose opinions matter are the players and their partners.

Max Fried, Mason Miller prove there is no ‘right’ way to handle paternity leave

There is also something deeply backward about treating a father being present for childbirth as an optional luxury that becomes increasingly selfish depending on the importance of the baseball game happening that night.

MLB literally has a paternity list for this reason. Miller didn't abandon his teammates. He used a collectively recognized form of leave because his wife was giving birth to their child.

And despite being without their closer, the Padres survived. They beat Milwaukee 4-3, with Michael King recording a six-out save to extend their season. Funny how that works.

Baseball teams are built with 26 players. Organizations have contingency plans for injuries, illness and every other form of unexpected absence because human beings are not machines programmed exclusively around a postseason schedule. Having a baby belongs pretty comfortably in the category of "life event more important than baseball."

Meanwhile, none of this should diminish Fried's choice. The Yankees' season is on the brink, and their ace wants the baseball. Yankees fans can appreciate his willingness to pitch an elimination game while understanding that another player could make the exact opposite decision and deserve precisely the same respect.

That's the distinction this conversation keeps missing. Fried doesn't need to be criticized for pitching, and Miller doesn't need to be criticized for leaving. And after watching the baseball world rally around Vesia and his family less than a year ago, we really shouldn't need another reminder that there are moments when the scoreboard becomes spectacularly insignificant.

A player should never have to wonder whether strangers will accuse him of abandoning his team because he chose to be beside his partner while their child entered the world.

Max Fried has made his choice. Mason Miller made his. Both were theirs to make. There never needed to be a debate in the first place.

Add us as a preferred source on Google

Follow