Yankees' 2024 draft pick is screwed no matter how much they tank in September

But, on the bright side ... nothing! Nothing at all.

Aaron Judge Press Conference
Aaron Judge Press Conference / Dustin Satloff/GettyImages

God forbid the 2023 Yankees be able to embrace the one silver lining struggling clubs have clung to for decades.

Struggling through a mega-sized 162-game season is extraordinarily painful -- twice as brutal as any poor NBA or NHL campaign, and a cool 10.125 times worse than the worst NFL season you've ever seen (though try telling that to Lions fans). No matter how long your scuffles are, though, there's always a light at the end of the tunnel, featuring some degree of brightness: The Draft!

As a reward for their repugnance, a terrible team is typically gifted with an upper-echelon pick. Thanks to MLB's new lottery, it's tough to tank your way directly to the top, but playing poorly at least guarantees you a shot at an upper tier of prospect talent.

Unless you're the 2023 Yankees, who passed the luxury tax threshold by so much money that their first-round pick will get bumped back 10 spaces next year, no matter where they finish. Goodbye, 12th pick! Hello, 22nd!

Yankees 2024 first-round draft pick will drop 10 spots because they're very smart and good

At least -- at the very least -- there was nothing the Yankees could've done at their inactive 2023 trade deadline to avoid this. Initially, Ken Rosenthal of The Athletic reported that New York intended to duck under the highest luxury tax level in order to save their draft pick from plummeting. Shortly thereafter, though, he retracted that proposition; shaving $1.1 million off their payroll to get below the Steve Cohen Tax could only save them from further financial ruin. Their draft pick was already doomed by their preseason spending (unless they could miraculously knock, like, $30 million off the ledger in a matter of minutes).

Side note, how funny is it that they didn't even sell enough at the deadline to knock that $1.1 million off? Doesn't this team love money?! Seriously, what are they doing?

We digress. Back to the doomed draft pick, which proves once and for all that rooting for the Yankees to tank will not get you the things you're looking for.

Future stars can be found at pick No. 25 just as often as they're uncovered at pick No. 15. That's part of the reason why arguing that the Yankees have long been behind the eight ball because of where they draft is inane. Aaron Boone's job seems to be on shaky ground, but losing/ill-advised fan boycotts won't change the way Hal Steinbrenner views Brian Cashman. Losing four extra games in September will not drastically alter the franchise's plan. Bummer, but it's true.

So root, root, root for the home team. Don't watch, but root. Praying for losses won't get you anywhere, and won't get you any closer to tanking for MLB's Wembanyama. The Yankees already got in their own way on that front in February.