If the 2023 MLB season goes the way MLB The Show 23 just predicted it will, you'll forgive Yankees fans for unplugging the controller and tossing it across the room. Maybe blow on the 2023 season and put it back in, that could help.
While the Yankees have already endured key injuries to Carlos Rodón, Frankie Montas, Tommy Kahnle, Lou Trivino and Harrison Bader this spring, both Rodón and Bader will (reportedly) return before the end of April, and while the team's pitching depth has been tested, the consensus opinion reflects confidence in the people who are still active.
Well, JK, apparently, because the video game industry foresees the Yankees crashing and burning, wrapping 2023 with an 84-78 record in MLB The Show 23's recent simulation.
How did we get here? Is the AL East a gauntlet that takes no prisoners, in this season sim? Well ... not exactly. The game predicts the Rays will finish dead last at 75-87, while the Orioles will tread water and fall back a bit at 77-85.
That means ... oh, God ... the Red Sox are projected to finish with 98 wins, while the Blue Jays grab a ridiculous 108 virtual victories. And somehow, neither of them are in the Fake World Series -- they still don't manage to hold off the Astros, even in the digital space. Horrific!
Yankees 2023 Season Predictions from MLB The Show: Bad!
Sure, there's a lot of optimism around the Jays' efforts to retool their outfield defense (at the expense of the offense), and the Masataka Yoshida signing looks a lot better for the Red Sox after the World Baseball Classic than it did before the event began.
Still ... 98 wins?! That would have to be a Full 2013 Once-in-a-Blue-Moon Overperformance Spectacular, with every single Sox batter/pitcher playing the role of Steve Pearce. Could it happen? Sure! It happens every few years with this team, whether they have a plan or not. But MLB The Show's nightmare is on another level, including Justin Turner winning the batting title and John Schreiber being named Reliever of the Year. Every Chaim Bloom's swing has become a master class, in this realm. You can't make this stuff up, folks. It's like it was intended to stab me in the eyes.
And how did the Jays get all the way to 108 wins?! Did Kevin Gausman go 30-3, Denny McLain-style? Did they trade for Teoscar Hernández midseason and get their big bats back? Much to ponder ... but not for too long, in order to prevent a preseason mental breakdown directed at a collection of pixels.
Just ... please don't have your worst season since 2016, Yankees. And don't let the Sox and Jays run roughshod over the rest of the league before being turned away by the 'Stros when it counts.
The only silver lining of the simulation? The Braves advance out of the NL (past the 76-86 Phillies, who have it even worse than us) and stomp the Astros in the Fall Classic. Acceptable. Ridiculously hard road to get there, but technically acceptable.
Just keep us posted on whether the Simulated Hal fires Brian Cashman after this debacle of a virtual year.