One stat proves every Red Sox fan's favorite trade target will kill Yankees, too

The day Red Sox fans acknowledge that they behave exactly like the Yankees fans they claim to despise, we'll all be better for it. This copycat hypocritical behavior is never more evident than when a player they covet hits the open market. The presumptions that he's already theirs quickly reach a fever pitch, as Bostonians treat the rest of baseball like their personal farm (again, something I was told they hated).

This summer, the way-too-presumptuous telegraphed target of affection was Joe Ryan of the Twins, who'd be a perfect long-term complement to Garrett Crochet and Bryan Bello atop their rotation. What felt like a longshot at the All-Star break (while current Red Sox were very obviously trying to get photographed with Ryan as much as possible to drum up certain emotions) became much more realistic in the deadline's final hours, when the Twins said, "F*** it" and started stripping themselves for parts. A Ryan deal may or may not have been close, but the rumors certainly fooled several prominent social media accounts into claiming a trade was finished.

They also fooled Ryan himself, who thought he was headed to Boston — and still might be. The Red Sox will no doubt begin talks anew this winter, and if they're willing to pay a hefty price (Wilyer Abreu? Payton Tolle? It'll take more than just spare parts.), they'll have a shot (though someone should probably up the ante, given how obvious and entitled they've been about this whole thing).

The Yankees would be wise to join the bidding, given that Ryan is cut from the Aroldis Chapman cloth of guys who'd rather stick it to the Yanks than be a part of it. What started from an observation about Shane Smith's high-velocity buzzsaw work became a full-on investigation last weekend into whose fastball adds the most heat when they're facing the pinstripes. Surprise! Ryan finished second, obviously getting a head start on preparing for his future — unless, again, someone else feels like bidding and at least making this difficult for Boston.

Potential future Yankees enemy Joe Ryan got especially amped up to pitch against them this summer

Ah. Nice!

On the flip side, it's not like the Red Sox can get much better in the rotation than their current status, with Crochet, Bello, and Lucas Giolito all ranking among the top five ERAs in the AL since June 10 at the start of the weekend.

Still, it stings to think about that obnoxious fan base getting their way yet again, as another player who "gets up" for the Yankees joins their merry band of fake underdogs. Someone can stop this, you know. Other teams have the power to be cool.