Chase Burns absolutely embarrasses Yankees in filthy first inning of MLB debut

The New York Yankees' offense has been struggling, averaging 2.7 runs per game over their past 11 contests (3-8 record) and failing to score over three runs in any of those eight losses. Things have gotten even worse when they've encountered a runner in scoring position; the "best offense in baseball" is hitting .167 with a .176 slugging percentage and 1 wRC+ (one!) over the past 12 games. They rank 28th, last, and last in MLB in those three stats over the course of that span.

So, with Cincinnati Reds flamethrower Chase Burns toeing the rubber on Tuesday for his much-ballyhooed MLB debut, what would happen when a potentially unstoppable (but also potentially nervous) force met the most movable object to ever be moved?

Hmm. Well, as it turns out, Burns ran over the Yankees with a trash compactor in the first inning of his big league career.

Cincinnati Reds' Chase Burns smashes New York Yankees' offense, including Aaron Judge, in trash compactor in three-strikeout first innings

Look. Baseball is hard. The grind of a long season is relentless. Some nights? Well, they're just not going to be your night.

The hope was that the Yankees might be able to hold themselves to a high standard against a somewhat skittish Burns, whose stuff might dance around the zone rather than in and out of it. Who knows? Maybe the kid might even make a mistake with a straight-ish fastball, the type of pitch that can get you through Dayton and Chattanooga, but doesn't hold up quite the same against the first-place team in the AL East.

Counterpoint: Welp!

Burns knifed through the top of the Yankees' order - Trent Grisham, Ben Rice, Aaron Judge - like a destructive pitcher cutting through a butter made of tired losers. He then struck out the first two batters of the second inning, too, well en route to the kind of debut you read about in fables and fairytales.

The Yankees needed patient at-bats and a get-right game. They ... are not going to get it, it would appear. But hey, look on the bright side: can't change those RISP numbers if you never put a runner in scoring position!