Yankees fan screaming at Red Sox kids proves we’re losing it

NEW YORK, NY - JUNE 05: Manager Aaron Boone #17 of the New York Yankees in action against the Boston Red Sox during a game at Yankee Stadium on June 5, 2021 in New York City. (Photo by Rich Schultz/Getty Images)
NEW YORK, NY - JUNE 05: Manager Aaron Boone #17 of the New York Yankees in action against the Boston Red Sox during a game at Yankee Stadium on June 5, 2021 in New York City. (Photo by Rich Schultz/Getty Images)

Good news: One Yankees fan showed more fire than Aaron Boone this weekend, handling her business in the stands instead of asking Phil Nevin to do it for her!

Bad news: She “owned” a bunch of kids. Though based on the umpiring we saw Sunday night, these legitimate elementary schoolers might’ve been more qualified.

Though you could’ve definitely convinced me it had happened in the past two or three years, the Yankees were swept in a three-game home series this weekend by the Red Sox for the first time since June 2011 — a pretty good year for Boston until Sept. 1.

That particular season stands as proof that June 8 is way too soon to be judging things, as frustrating as this two-week stretch — and season overall — has been for Bombers fans.

The following video, on the other hand, serves as evidence of just how rotten your brain can get from one three-game losing streak to your rival.

Behold, a woman clad in Yankees gear taking a group of borderline toddlers to task over their team of choice.

Yankees fan screaming at literal Red Sox children is a bad look.

I’m definitely losing my mind more than most, but I would never scream at a bunch of children in Red Sox shirts. I’d wait 10 years, then scream at them as they were keying my car.

In my version of the events we just witnessed, I’d like to think that all these Boston kids were squeaking typical Southie insults, taking potshots at the Yankee fan’s mother at varying states of vulgarity. Unfortunately, that’s likely not what happened, and I’m going to go ahead and assume that she was in the wrong here.

That said, where are the parents? “Kids, go over to the foul pole and start screaming at that Yankees lady, your mom and I are gonna go uproot a stop sign.”

There’s nothing as painful as the long trip home after a late-night baseball game, as a 9-year-old. Your energy’s shot, you’re sleeping on the car window, you pull into some bodega at 1:00 AM to grab an apple juice and you can barely stand. You’ve got to wake up the next morning for … Zoom school? Yikes.

At least these kids got to rest easy, comforted by the sobering reality that their team is objectively better than the Yankees right now, and they’ve won the mental war, too. Wanna bet she’s still standing by the foul pole, screaming to no one?