The New York Yankees schedule is now unmitigated nonsense as MLB attempts to play through a COVID-19 outbreak.
Are you ready to read a bunch of stuff about the New York Yankees that makes total sense? Good. That’s exactly what I have for you — certainly not a bunch of Grade-A garbled gibberish straight from the offices of Major League Baseball intended to keep the league churning after the entire Miami Marlins team caught coronavirus.
Since the team departed Washington on Sunday, the Yankees have been stuck in a hotel in Philadelphia — though not the same hotel the Miami Marlins just inhabited while group-texting about improvised MLB protocol (It’s like jazz! It’s about the tests you don’t take!).
Naturally, they haven’t gotten much work in, while waiting for the Phillies to pass a series of rapid-action coronavirus tests intended to determine if they’d head back to the Bronx to face ’em on Wednesday and Thursday.
Good news: They passed!
Bad news: They paused!
No one really trusts the tests, either. Rapid tests might not have picked up on the coronavirus, thanks to the incubation period. Plus, Juan Soto’s tests have been flip-flopping on him more than Michael Scott at the front of the vasectomy line.
So, therefore, the Marlins’ season has been paused, as the outbreak has spread to about half the active roster. The Phillies’ season has been put on hold, too, until at least Friday.
And the Yankees? Oh, they’re going to Baltimore tomorrow to play the O’s instead. Right? Right.
Yes, it’s confirmed. New York to Baltimore, and perhaps the four games they’re losing against the Phillies will slot in later, replacing two O’s showdowns?
Ahh, but four games is more than two, leaving a pair of games still floating…
As anticipated, even this ill-advised city swap doesn’t solve every problem.
The Marlins are still highly infectious, and I can’t imagine being comfortable playing them at this point next week, either. Someone already suggested the State Patrol meeting the Marlins at the border if they try to come to Baltimore … and this? THIS I’ve gotta SEE!
There’s also the whole problem of, I don’t know, shoving an entire baseball team into a Baltimore hotel. A team that had no intention of being there.
Every part of baseball’s plan has to be pristine for it to work. Instead, MLB has given us Andrew Cuomo spouting off at random about housing every single team in the New York area, as the league continues to jam 25-man rosters sideways into the mail slot.
The Yankees are working out in Baltimore on Tuesday night, per Lindsey Adler. Allegedly. Why? I don’t know. Third base! The Blue Jays play in Buffalo now. This MLB season is like a wizard, just…pointing at things.
Remind me why we can’t just pause the entire season until September and embark on a 30-team postseason? Is it money? It’s money, right?