New York Yankees fans can now own a piece of Billy Martin’s personal life.
Hey, Yankees fans: Who among us needs a lake house? Everybody? Sure.
Well, what if we sweetened the pot? Or, rather, put the pot on the wall, converted it into an entirely different type of commode, and gilded it? Intrigued?
Can’t you just visualize an enraged Martin going face-to-face with the Boss, shoving a stubby finger in his face, and squealing, “I OWN A GOLDEN URINAL, YOU *******!”?
This four-bedroom, 3.5-bathroom beauty is in Port Crane, New York, if you happen to be on the market for old Yankees’ second homes and can’t afford Mickey Mantle’s beachfront cabana or Gil McDougald’s ski chalet. It also comes with its own eight-acre lake. Perhaps this is where Martin fled to after brawling at the Copa in ’57?!
Based on the remainder of the photos given, it seems like most of the place has gotten a lovely modern update, but some of the wood paneling appears to be straight out of Martin’s era. Additionally, per the other photos provided, the gold urinal in question appears to be located in another room entirely, as compared to the toilet and…what I believe to be a bidet.
Now, you could take this information in stride. You could also be the Yankees beat writers.
We’d rather be the beat writers.
“I LIKE TO BE CLEAN, MR. STEINBRENNER. YOU TAKE ISSUE WITH THIS?!”
Martin’s number is forever retired in Yankee land, but seeing this house might make you want to give the five-time World Series champion (as a player and manager) a proper second sendoff.
This Lake House Season, it helps to be secluded. It also helps to wash your hands for 20 seconds and, just to be safe, use the toilet, gold urinal, and bidet, all in succession. You can do that here.