A Yankees article that is not all about Aaron Judge

The Yankees are an offensive machine right now. And it is about a lot more than just one guy, no matter how good he is. It seems that guys through—AARONJUDGEAARONJUDGEAARONJUDGE—oh, sorry about that. It’s just that the guy is playing like the best player in baseball and sometimes I slip; won’t happen again. Now back to this non-Aaron Judge related article.

Yankees Brian Cashman is the real hero of the story of the 2017 season. He took bold risks and made shrewd trades, culminating in a talent-laden organization. And that is the real exciting news…

...which is true, all that crap about the team and everything, but, my god, did you see that home run Judge hit to left, almost hitting the retired numbers? It went almost 500 feet!

Anything that moves that far, that fast, usually has a flight attendant on it. Yeah, everyone on the team can hit home runs but there is only one man in baseball who can hit one that far: Aaron Judge; the Yankees Aaron Freakin’ Judge!

Okay, sorry again. I can do this; I just need to breathe. Alright, I’m okay now. Let me focus on Didi Gregorius. He is having a great year and has improved as much as, well, I was going to say anyone on the team.

But that’s not true.

Because Aaron Judge is on this freakin’ team! He went from striking out in half his at-bats to striking fear in the hearts of AL pitchers. He hits the ball so damn hard, and home runs so far that his homers should be called by a different word, like Ouch. Yes, that’s right; from now on, when Judge hits a home run, it will now be called an Ouch.

Focus Daniel-San

Well, now that that is settled, I can take my mind off of the one player and focus on the many (as Spock would want me to do). Because it takes more than home runs to win day in and day out. It takes getting hits and walks every day, as much as possible, because OBP is the lifeblood of any offense.

Which is just another unusual aspect to Aaron Judge! Have you seen his slash lately? Fine, here it is .341/.448/.714.

Yeah, those numbers are right; and he’s a Rookie! And he has a GD cannon for an arm out in right field. I wouldn’t run home from third in fear the ball would hit me and cause a concussion.

Alright. I can see this is not going to work. Instead, let me introduce a guest writer, and friend: With Hair Vinnie, from the Bronx. With Hair is going to help by giving his insights into the Yankees team as a whole.

“Hey howyadoin’ Vinnie?”

“Yeah, howyoudoin.”

“Hey, not fur nuthin’ but the Yankees look great; what do you think so far?”

“Whado I think? I think Aaron Judge is freakin’ awesome. I mean, hey, the guy’s a beast, capiche? Every freakin’ time I turn around, he’s winning the AL Rookie of the week or the month, or I don’t even know anymore. Whaddya goingtodo.”

“Yes, well, Judge has won the Rookie of the Month for the first two months of the season and has already won at least one weekly award in June. He’s doing really, really great. But let’s talk about some of the other players, like Luis Severino. He is leading a dynamic pitching staff, right now, and I’m sure Yankees fans want them to keep it going.”

More with Bal…, er, With Hair Vinnie

“Your lips to God’s ears! But, no, seriously, they’re dynamic alright; dynamically watching home runs fly over the bullpen. That’s when they’re dynamic. Hey, I kid because I care.
Seriously, those guys are doin’ a great job. But, marone, I mean, how can I not get excited about this Judge kid. I mean, if there were a Greek God of baseball, it would be Aaron freakin’ Judge.”

“What would he be called, like, Judge-o-lonius or something?”

“How the frig would I know? What am I, a Greek scholar or sumpen?”

“I’m sorry, we got off track. It’s just that I am working on an article that’s not about Aaron Judge.”

“Why the frig would you wantta do that? If da season ended ta-day, okay, that friggin’ guy would win the Rookie of the Year and the MVP. And you want to write about, who, like frickin’ Chris Carter ovah here? Give me a friggin’ break ahready!”

Giving Him a Friggin’ Break

With Hair Vinnie makes a point. The story of the 2017 New York Yankees is a winning season so far. But every story needs a hero and Aaron Judge is that guy. He plays the game the right way and always with that giant, gap-tooth grin that makes us think he is going to the field across the street from the stadium to play a pick-up game with the other 8-year old’s.

And he hits those moon shots that fly deep into the stands, creating instant Yankees Classics for YES. But what is perhaps best about the Yankees Aaron Judge is that he is baseball at its best. Baseball is a kids game and he is the biggest kid in the game. I half expect to turn on the movie Sandlot and see them wearing shirts with his image on them.

Next: See how Aaron Freakin' Judge is impacting the Legacy of Mickey Mantle

I will try again to think and write of the other Yankees. Because this is a great team, only led by a great big man. And it is right to give him the bulk of the praise because, if this ever falls apart, he will get the bulk of the criticism. So I guess this turned out be just another article about Aaron Judge after all. At least I tried.

Now I can go back to waiting for him to hit another long Ouch.