Dear Carl Pavano,
Great pitching performance yesterday against the Yankees. Seriously… six innings, four hits, one walk, only one earned run and four Ks… you really did the Cleveland Indians proud versus your former team that got punked out of about $40 million when you played in pinstripes. But, I really have to laugh at the irony. Maybe with your “low” money deal with the Tribe, the lowered expectations won’t make your nutsack get so tight. Yes, Mr. Pavano, I’m sure Cleveland can expect more production from you as you gave yesterday (Box Score).
Oh wait, maybe not. [...]

NOTE: the format change. The Futility List is all about that… futility. Sure, many another website will give you a nice and clean MLB team/player power rankings, listing the league from top to bottom, but I say let’s just get down with the bottom of the barrel. The Futility List will give you the top ten worst things that went down the previous week, as well as give you a nice picture of a chick with whom your attempts to pick up are futile. This week, we have Brooklyn Decker.
1. Chien-Ming Wang has been one crappy [...]

Some guy showed up against the Cleveland Indians wearing Chien-Ming Wang’s jersey and proceeded to give up 8 runs in 1 and 1/3 innings. Cleveland went on to win 22-4 over the New York Yankees (Box Score), but no worries die-hard Yankees fans, the Yanks are still ahead of the Boston Red Sox by half a game.
It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out that there is something not quite right with Wang. My theory? Cloning gone awry – it’s so hard to get them to be just like the original.
Current Record: 6-6 (1-2; 5-4); 2.5 games behind [...]

Well, Derek Jeter did it again. He was what many people call, “clutch”. As the game with the Cleveland Indians was tied 5-5 in the bottom of the eighth inning, and with two outs, Jeter stepped to the plate against Jensen Lewis and reminded everyone why he will be known as one of the greatest New York Yankees ever. On a 3-1 pitch, Jeter took Lewis yard and hit what turned out to be the game-winning home run and the run that led to the Yankees’ first win in their new home (Boxscore).
However, Jeter’s wasn’t the only [...]

As much as possible, we’ll look “outside the yard” to give love to some other blogs that throw down some knowledge we’re digging. Check it:

Great breakdown of the opening day Yankees loss at the new stadium debacle from a Cleveland POV… (Waiting For Next Year)

Heath Bell keeps mouthing off and I personally have no problem with it… (Rumors and Rants)

This isn’t really surprising, is it?… (Chicago Tribune)

Red Sox Nation… the musical?… (Comcast Sports)

Sizing Up Yankee Stadium… (Extra Mustard/SI.com)

Every now and then, I’ll post up some videos of some dope music or at least what I think is dope music. I’m an old school dude, growing up in Queens, NY for about three decades before moving to Long Island when I got married. In any case, my formidable years were during the 1980s when I breakdanced in the street and subways, did a ridiculous Michael Jackson (pre-reverse tan) impersonation that had girls coming to my house just to see, and actually saw “Krush Groove,” the “Breakin’” movies, and “Beat Street” in the movie theaters! [...]

I cannot lie to you… I wrote about three paragraphs and didn’t like anything that I wrote. Not that I think the words stunk, but because the middle relief has me effin’ frustrated!!! Thanks for melting down during the first game at the new Yankee Stadium, guys (Boxscore). So, I’ll keep this short. Damaso Marte obviously cannot pitch in pinstripes (5.40 ERA in 18.1 innings in 2008; 27.00 ERA in 2.0 innings thus far in 2009). Jose Veras is about half-crappy compared to Marte as Veras has a 13.50 ERA in 3.1 innings in 2009. [...]

Prediction #1: There will be a lot of people in the stadium, of which some will be inebriated, of which some will defile the new stadium with vomit. Grandmothers across the world that still have the plastic covers on their furniture will feel the echoing pain universally.
Prediction #2: There will be many exclamations and profanities uttered and/or yelled in regards to the price of food and drink, which normally wouldn’t be anything out of the ordinary, but it’s so bad that many a rich people will think of how they can sneak in food the next time they come [...]

During their game with the Tampa Bay Rays on April 15th, 2009, the New York Yankees honored Mariano Rivera by wearing his treasured #42 on their jerseys. It’s a fitting honor for the BEST. CLOSER. EVER. And because of the obvious inspiration that Rivera brings to his team, the Yankees pulled out a 4-3 win (Boxscore) with a Derek Jeter hit in the top of the ninth with guess who coming in the bottom of the ninth for the save… yeah… Mo. BEST. CLOSER. EVER.
You would think the Yankees would wait until tomorrow [...]

After eight games of grueling competition and the assessment by a panel of me, myself, and I, the tally has been made official and Nick Swisher is the best New York Yankees acquisition during the offseason. The voters have said the following about Swisher’s competition…